Thursday, April 3, 2014

Life's Jigsaw - Character

Life is like a jigsaw puzzle. Each little piece is an aspect of our journey through it. And when at last we find that last piece and fit it into place, we eventually see the meaning of this life.


UBC Day 3
The C piece - Character

All things in life must balance, so when we receive blessings, we should also be prepared for some rough moments too.

But the rough or difficult moments are great teachers.

And it is in those moments that our true strength of character shows.

Some years ago someone at work abused and insulted me. She was a powerful lady with a lot of clout. Obviously I had no chance against her and luckily for me the project got cancelled and so I left.

At a moment like that it is very easy to either play the victim or behave in a similar manner. But that would not have helped me in any way.

I was quite dejected and it took a while for me to get back on my feet again. The women had shattered my confidence but not my dignity, not my self respect and not the respect of others towards me as I behaved professionally and graciously toward her. I could look at her, but she couldn't look at me. I left with my head held high with the best wishes of my managers and workmates some of whom I still keep in touch with.

Friends told me I should take action against her and the managers who stood by and did nothing. But revenge only keeps that cycle of karma going for what goes around then comes around. There is no escape as that is the law of the Universe. Besides which, when karma and God are sweet revenge why bother taking on that additional burden!

I did however tell those managers that I did not accept their silence as that only condoned her actions, but I did understand their reason for it.

As all things must balance, the difficult times are then neutralised by blessings and so the benevolent Universe soothed and comforted me by bringing to me some awesome jobs and wonderful managers and workmates.

Adversity builds character.

I'm a better person as a result of that incident.


"You express the truth of your character with the choice of your actions"
 ~ Steve Maraboli


Written for: A to Z Challenge and The Ultimate Blogging Challenge


Drop by my facebook page Suzy's Ilation and if any of your posts needs some tlc, leave a link there and I'll drop by and give it some love.



Warm Regards
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82 comments:

  1. So very true. It's only during tough times that we figure out who we actually are. Great post. Cheers

    http://jiljilramamani.blogspot.com

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    1. Thanks Deepa. Glad you liked my post and glad you dropped by.

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  2. I was waiting eagerly for your next installment in your "Life is a Jigsaw". Great post!!

    ~http://iamstri.wordpress.com/
    Participant|AtoZ Challenge 2014
    Smile, it makes (y)our day!

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    1. Thanks Stri. Glad you liked it and thanks for your support.

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  3. "I did however tell those managers that I did not accept their silence ..., but I did understand their reason for it." This was a balanced response without any bitterness. In a similar situation, I told a person that, while he had certainly done me a grave injustice, I bore him no ill-will because of the good turn he had done me earlier.
    I completely agree that "Adversity builds character."

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    1. No point in being bitter or staying bitter. Thanks ProactiveIndian.

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  4. How amazing your way of blending the theme into the post is ! This fits so well into the jigsaw :) True character is what we see when we blend adversities with ideals :)

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    1. Thanks Sreeja. Love how you summed it up.

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  5. Suzy, I associate the word Serene with you. And truly, incidents like these teach us,if only we choose to learn. Adversity does build character as you rightly pointed out.

    Ishithaa
    #AtoZChallenge

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  6. C is for Character, for sure. C is also for Clearly Communicating. This is what you have done here in this post, I feel. Taken up something very important and communicated the essence of it so clearly and simply, with a real-life example. Enjoyed reading the post, Suzy!

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    1. Thanks Beloo, Glad you liked my post and found clarity in it.

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  7. There is nothing better for C than Character I think...You are right Suzy we should build our Character for that stands with us through life... You are an amazing woman for not doing anything to the lady..I find it so hard to let go and forgive...

    Random Thoughts Naba

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    1. Thanks Naba. there was a time when I would react badly but over the years one finally learns it is bet to forgive and let go.

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  8. Good one! Adversity shows up our strengths

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  9. Firstly you write so well! There is a character I have seen in your writings and it is gracious! This incident has made me respect you more! And I agree what goes around comes around! Brilliant C!

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    1. Thanks Aditi for your very sweet comment. Glad you liked my post.

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  10. I like the sentence about her not being able to take away your dignity, Suzy. That's the best part!

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    1. Thanks Corinne. When we give our dignity away it's like selling our soul.

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  11. You did the right thing but how could she be mean to you? You ooze positivity and good cheer, loved your post. Hugs and take care.

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    1. Thanks Sulekha for your very sweet comment. Who knows why people behave the way they do.

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  12. So very true Suzy. Adversity builds character. I read somewhere yesterday if you don't die you will never live.I am glad you didn't get stuck in that incident like many others and chose to live :)

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    1. Thanks Juzta Mom. If this had occurred some years ago I probably would've reacted differently. It's just easier to forgive and move on than to wallow in pity and revenge.

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  13. I liked the way you have driven the point. Getting down to someone's level, will make us small like them.

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  14. Usually we realize how strong we are or what we have become only when the storm passes. Good for you that you could do it in the midst of the storm. And so often such people keep taking advantage of one's goodness as they are mean by nature.

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    1. Thanks Prathima. Yes there are those that will keep taking advantage. We need to be strong and draw that ring around us much like the Lakshmana rekha and stop them from doing that. That incident has taught me that as well.

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  15. Suzy, hugs to u for the sort of person that shines through this post of yours. Hats off, though I dont wear a hat :)

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    1. Thanks Sunila for your very sweet comment. Glad to have you here.

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  16. Very true ! glad to connect here once again Thanks for sharing you experience !

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    1. Thanks Genevive. Nice to connect again too.

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  17. Working with others, especially ones who seem to be so miserable in their own life they have to cast their misery on others, is unbelievably hard. Hugs to you for having to deal with such a person, and kudos for having the strength to rise above. :)

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    1. Thanks Authorangelachristinaarcher. You hit the nail on the head - lashing out at others is usually a sign that things are not all good in your own world.

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  18. It needs lot of will power to not behave just like THE OTHERS !
    I cant do that so kudos to u

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    1. Thanks Afshan - taken me a long time to learn that. Someday you will be able to do that too. Hugs.

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  19. Rough times polishes us and makes us better.... Beautiful share :)

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    1. Thanks Sheethal. Love how you summed it up.

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  20. Suzy from where do you get so much tranquility and depth... I look forward to reading you each day

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    1. Thanks Shiva. there was a time when anger and hurt ruled my roost. It took a lot of soul searching to break out of that.

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  21. Oh even I had a same experience.....
    You are right why take the additional responsibility when the law of the universe is in force..

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    1. Thanks Sitara. I'm sorry you had to go through something similar but it does make us better people.

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  22. I heart this post because it echoes my sentiments on letting things go :) I am so glad that you did what was right for you. May I also add how I like the way you link the previous day's post to the current one and make your own jigsaw? Very appealing.

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    1. Thanks Shailaja Glad you are enjoying my jigsaw. Letting go is liberating.

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  23. I agree completely, Suzy. Revenge and vengeance are a burden to carry. If we must pay back, let it be in good coin. I just love this post. When people act dirty with us, we don't have to stoop to their level.

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    1. Thanks Cynthia. Love the way you summarise my thoughts.

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  24. I can relate to this..... Good post. :)

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    1. Thanks Viewsofpreethib and glad you dropped by.

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  25. What an amazing post! I've been here before, it;s not a pleasant situation at all. I'm glad we have the ability to rise above. I look forward to reading more from you. :)

    Misty at Dancing In The Weeds

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    1. Thanks Misty. Glad you liked my post. No, it was definitely not pleasant and I was quite shaken but thank goodness we have the strength to rise above it. Hugs.

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  26. Very true! I firmly believe that it's easy to be nice when things are good, how you react to difficult situations is a true test of charecter

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    1. Thanks Peddlerofdreams. My dad often said that to me.

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  27. So true. It doesn't seem fair that we must suffer and made miserable to gain insight, strength, and build our character but that is the way of it. Life is full of tests and trials. It is how we handle them and survive them that makes us who we are♥

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    1. Thanks Kathy - you have spoken true words of wisdom. Thank you my friend. Love and hugs.

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  28. Perhaps sometimes I feel people react badly because of a chain of reaction they have sustained too. But honestly reacting to anything should be a test of character..

    Richa

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    1. So true Richa. We should break the unworthy chains and build the good ones.

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  29. Great post, Suzy. I agree with you, Adversity builds character and someone once told me, Always ACT never REACTS and you've ACTED. Thumbs up for the inspiring post:)

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    1. Thanks Vishal. And those are very wise words.

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  30. Behaving professionally and gracefully is admirable. That's an inspiring anecdote from your life. Thanks for sharing.

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  31. We emerge stronger after such incidents !

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  32. Awesome theme for A to Z! So many things make up a character, something all we writers ought to bear in mind. :)

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  33. Awesome theme and totally resonate with you and how. Life at every phase has taught me one thing. Everything happens for a reasaon. Your serenity and calmness in accepting the situation is motivating. Will look forward to the next one. :)

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    1. Thanks Rubina. Glad you visited and glad you like my theme.

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  34. I'm sorry you had such an unfortunate experience! You were right to stand up for yourself!

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    1. Thanks Roshni. I surprised myself a little both with being so calm and for taking a stand albeit a small one.

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  35. Hi, Suzy,

    It is indeed wonderful to be able to walk tall, knowing that you did your best in the situation.

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    1. Thanks JL. Yes it is a good feeling to be able to hold your head high. Thanks for visiting.

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  36. So true...adversity builds character. Sometimes, the worst brings out the best in us .

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  37. i have found that the things that have happed in the past haveturned out to be the good things that have come from them today x

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    1. Thanks Lisa. Yes, these are often blessings in disguise.

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  38. This post just goes to show how resilient you are Suzy! Adversity does indeed build character. We learn, we grow and we become stronger for it!

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    1. Thanks PB. Adversity is a great teacher. Sometimes it is the only way we learn.

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  39. Very inspiring to read about your situation and how you handled it, Suzy. You have such a great attitude about it. I've been in bad work situations before and acted like a victim by crying, feeling helpless and emotional which isn't a good way to be. I like how you used the experience to learn from and grow, without losing your dignity. Good for you!

    http://cattitudeandgratitude.blogspot.ca/2014/04/k-is-for-kobie.html

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  40. My dad used to tell me, "You can make it better or you can make it worse. Choose your poison." I try hard to follow that advice to this day, although I often fall short, as my hot temper tends to get the best of me. I guess the first step is knowing you have a problem, and the second step is admitting it. Now I'm on the third step: Stop behaving like an ass! haha! :)

    I'm participating in AtoZ, too. See you around!
    ~Andi-Roo
    @TheWorld4Realz / TheWorld4Realz.com

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