Tension is Treacherous

Tension is treacherous. It has this uncanny knack of creating havoc within our minds and bodies and its primary function is to create unnecessary panic. And yet we love taking on tension and are so reluctant to let it go.

So what is the cause of tension? In my view the primary causes of tension are fear of failure, fear of the unknown (thinking the worst) and perfectionism.

This morning my son was in a state of panic as he was far from completing an assignment due in tomorrow. He's a perfectionist and a deep thinker. Assignments must be perfect and anything less than an A is just not good enough. What if I can't complete, what if I fail were words that made his head droop and the worry lines appear on his forehead. I can totally relate to that as I was the same when I was his age and watching him tense up made me a little tense too.

So I sent him on his way with some words of encouragement -

• focus on the task at hand not at what may or may not be
• focus on completing not on perfection
• focus on the mandatory requirements not all requirements
• keep working as stopping is guaranteed failure but persevering gives you a chance to succeed 
• what will be will be - if you fail, there's always the next assignment or next year and failure teaches many valuable lessons
• there is no person in the world who has never failed, let go of failure fear as it only holds you back and creates panic and panic inhibits the ability to think clearly

and most important of all

• have faith in yourself 

And that somehow eased my tension too. 

I love this quote as I believe that failure at some points in our lives is certain, but it need not hold us back:

Success is falling nine times and getting up ten.

~ Jon Bon Jovi

Today I am co-hosting the Write Tribe #MondayMusings with Corinne who blogs at Everyday Gyaan. Join us by writing a post on a subject of your choice . Add the hashtag #MondayMusings to your post and link it to the linky below. Make it as personal as possible and do visit other blogs that are linked here.

I am also linking to #MicroblogMonday at Stirrup Queens


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Life's Jigsaw - Obsessions

Life is like a jigsaw puzzle. Each little piece is an aspect of our journey through it. And when at last we find that last piece and fit it into place, we eventually see the meaning of this life.

UBC Day 17
The O Piece - Obsessions

Nature teaches us so beautifully that all things must balance.

But as human beings we are obsessed with achieving at any cost, we are obsessed with academics, we are obsessed with being wealthy, we are obsessed with finding love, we are obsessed with having the perfect body, we are obsessed with being one up on others, we are obsessed with reaching the top in our work, we are obsessed with having the fancy car and the mansion.

We believe that when we have got all of that, then we are successful and life is good. And when we fail to achieve all of that, dissatisfaction and frustration sets in.

Some obsessions are unhealthy and unfortunately create imbalances in our lives and in that chase for what we classify as success we forget to live, to appreciate all that we have, what the world holds for us.

I too went down many an obsessive path. Perhaps my greatest obsession was in having the perfect body. I've been on so many diets and exercise regimes. And the harder I tried the more annoyed I got when the weight that fell away a little, wouldn't shift any further. I was at the gym or at the karate class, or walking.

My life was just whizzing by and I was missing out on the little things. Like watching some TV with my kids, helping them with their homework, playing a game with them, just conversing with them about anything in life. And all because I was obsessed with finding perfection.

"Perfection is not something you strive for, you are already in a state of perfection" was a message given to me one night just at the point when I was about to fall asleep.

I stopped the madness in time and cut back on all that crazy exercising. Yes, the weight came back on but now I share many moments with my children. And what would I do with the perfect body anyway. I am as I am meant to be and I am perfect just the way I am.

If we must have an obsession, let it be for something good, let it be such that it doesn't create imbalances. Be obsessed with living in joy, be obsessed with having a healthy mind, spirit and body, be obsessed with helping others and making a difference in their lives, be obsessed with kindness, be obsessed with compassion, be obsessed with respect for all, be obsessed with healthy loving.

I never lose an opportunity to speak about my obsession: 

humankind and the environment

 ~ Yann Arthus-Bertrand

Enjoy life and now and then, more often than not, do stop and smell the roses.


Written for: A to Z Challenge and The Ultimate Blogging Challenge


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Unexpected Priceless Treasure

Updated - It is a WOW post - check out others here

Written for:
The Write Tribe Treasure prompt
The letter U at ABC Wednesday
Blogadda WOW - Surprised

I'm not much of a gardener, but today the garden patch beckons. It is a brilliant day. Warm, not a cloud in the sky, a gentle breeze is blowing.  So gloves and spade in hand, ipod clipped to my shirt, I skip out to dig up that little corner and plant those seeds.

There seems to be a rhythm to my digging and for the first time I am actually enjoying the notion of gardening. There is heightened anticipation, as if I am onto something marvellous and a song in my heart, as if I am in flow with the Universe.

Then my spade strikes something hard. It won't budge. So I drop down on my knees and begin loosening up the dirt with my hands.  Quickly moving it aside, I find a little box, a little treasure chest.

I gently prise it out of the dirt and look at it in wonder. A part of me eager to open it a part of me hesitant at what I might find. Surprisingly for a treasure chest, there is no latch.  For an instance I think that's pretty odd but then shrug my shoulders and slowly lift the lid.

Wonder turns to astonishment as I am surprised to see a parcel with my name on it. It looks old like it had been buried in the chest for thousands of years. I untie the string and carefully remove the wrapping. Inside I find a piece of paper with a few lines scrawled across it.

For a fraction of a moment disappointment sinks in and then a thought comes into my head. Maybe these are clues to something and I love a puzzle! So I start to read:

"Forgiveness is not an action, it is a state of being"

"Happiness is not a pursuit, it is a state of being"

"Love is not something one gives or an emotion one feels, it is a state of being"

"Perfection is not something you strive for, you are already in a state of perfection"

"Peace cannot be found, it comes from total surrender"

"Total surrender cannot be piecemeal, it must be complete, all together, in every aspect of your life, in every moment of your life"

"And when you understand and know all of these, and when you dwell in them with every breath you take,
Then, and only then, you are Sat-Chit-Ananda 

(absolute truth, all pervading consciousness, bliss)

At first I frown, deep in thought and then my eyes light up for this is the message of the Universe and the essence of Spirit. And I read them again and again and again, and the meaning of each line takes shape at last. 

Oh what a treasure I have found. What a gift; unexpected, unimaginable, and infinitely priceless.

~x~

A few days ago I met up, over Christmas dinner, with some friends I hadn't met for years. Somehow I found myself sitting next to G and through our chit chat found that we are both on a similar spiritual path. The two of us got talking about the Universe and Spirit and G remarked that I looked different from the last time we met, like I was at complete peace with myself. We talked of forgiveness and love, of peace and joy, and many other things.

Over the next few days I pondered over our discussion and her remarks. And then one night, at that point when one is about to fall asleep, the words, written on that piece of paper in my story, came into my head. I've been analysing them these last few days, but that's for another day and other posts.

Then the "Treasure" prompt turns up at the Write Tribe, the letter U for ABC Wednesday, the Surprise prompt at Blogadda WOW and finally Jairam's guest post on Spirituality and Religion at Everyday Gyaan. And all of these collectively brought together my post today.

I am constantly amazed how the Universe brings together people who help each other on their spiritual paths, how it communicates with us and how it finds a way for us to spread its message. I am truly blessed. 

Wish you all a day when you find your treasure - the thing you desire the most.

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Warm Regards and many blessings


This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

Write Tribe prompt - Imagine you were digging to the ground in the backyard of your new home to create a vegetable patch and  found a treasure chest.