This week's challenge at Romantic Friday Writers is "Romantic Picnic" - to be written in 400 words or less.
This is my first post for this challenge.
We sat outside on the verandah of the Loaded Hog. He was so excited. "I've finally found the girl of my dreams" he said, his brown eyes lighting up and a big grin on his face. I could see the joy in his heart written all over his face.
His words pierced my heart and I felt the sadness wash over me. I wanted to be the girl of his dreams. But we were only friends and I should've expected that one day he would eventually find her. "Oh" I said, "who is she?"
"Can't tell you right now" he said with a twinkle in his eye. "But I want to do something really special for her. So what would be a perfect date?" he asked.
"Why don't you ask her?" I said, my enthusiasm fading fast. "I want it to be a surprise and a date to remember" he answered.
"She must be very special" I teased, trying to conceal my breaking heart. "Oh yes, one very special lady. So c'mon help me here." he coaxed sweetly.
And so I told him.
I spent a long and restless night. I really liked him so much. And now my world was crumbling.
"Meet me on Saturday 10am at Chicago on the Wharf" came the text from him the next morning.
He was waiting there, his dark brown hair gently blowing in the wind. He might be in love with someone else, but today he was here with me and I was going to enjoy each moment with him.
We hugged. Then he took my hand and led me to the waiting helicopter. The ride was spectacular and the scenery just took my breath away. I was like a kid, wide eyed and excited and I completely missed the fact that the gorgeous man sitting next to me watched only me.
Boomrock was amazing. A table for two set with the finest cutlery and a picnic hamper under a colourful shamiana. We ate our chicken sandwiches, fruit salad and chocolate mousse, chuckling with the irony of the fine cutlery and simple meal. But this was perfect.
And then the strains of Besame Mucho floated by. He took my hand and we danced slowly. "You're my special lady" he said quietly and the smile on my face reflected the joy in my heart.
It was my perfect date!
Word count 396 NCCO
Have a lovely day and check out the other entries here
Also linking to Blogging For Fun's prompt A reason to smile
Warm Regards
This is my first post for this challenge.
We sat outside on the verandah of the Loaded Hog. He was so excited. "I've finally found the girl of my dreams" he said, his brown eyes lighting up and a big grin on his face. I could see the joy in his heart written all over his face.
His words pierced my heart and I felt the sadness wash over me. I wanted to be the girl of his dreams. But we were only friends and I should've expected that one day he would eventually find her. "Oh" I said, "who is she?"
"Can't tell you right now" he said with a twinkle in his eye. "But I want to do something really special for her. So what would be a perfect date?" he asked.
"Why don't you ask her?" I said, my enthusiasm fading fast. "I want it to be a surprise and a date to remember" he answered.
"She must be very special" I teased, trying to conceal my breaking heart. "Oh yes, one very special lady. So c'mon help me here." he coaxed sweetly.
And so I told him.
I spent a long and restless night. I really liked him so much. And now my world was crumbling.
"Meet me on Saturday 10am at Chicago on the Wharf" came the text from him the next morning.
He was waiting there, his dark brown hair gently blowing in the wind. He might be in love with someone else, but today he was here with me and I was going to enjoy each moment with him.
We hugged. Then he took my hand and led me to the waiting helicopter. The ride was spectacular and the scenery just took my breath away. I was like a kid, wide eyed and excited and I completely missed the fact that the gorgeous man sitting next to me watched only me.
Boomrock was amazing. A table for two set with the finest cutlery and a picnic hamper under a colourful shamiana. We ate our chicken sandwiches, fruit salad and chocolate mousse, chuckling with the irony of the fine cutlery and simple meal. But this was perfect.
And then the strains of Besame Mucho floated by. He took my hand and we danced slowly. "You're my special lady" he said quietly and the smile on my face reflected the joy in my heart.
It was my perfect date!
Word count 396 NCCO
Have a lovely day and check out the other entries here
Also linking to Blogging For Fun's prompt A reason to smile
Warm Regards
Aww very romantic! You draw the reader right into the moment. Great job!
ReplyDeleteThanks Jessica for your nice comment. Glad you liked it.
DeleteSuzy, What a sweet and romantic story :) loved it.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sulekkha. Glad you liked it.
DeleteSecretive guy but he came through in the end.Brilliant story...
ReplyDeleteThanks Sulekkha. I did try to make him a little secretive.
DeletePerfect picnic!
ReplyDeleteThanks Janu. It's a date I dream about!
DeleteThat could have backfired on the poor guy if she hadn't been as giving a friend! You drew us in expertly. Great entry, Roland
ReplyDeleteThanks Roland. I guess it could have. perhaps the next time she might not be so giving ... mmm ... something to think about for next time.
DeleteLovely story, enjoyed the helicopter detail especially!
ReplyDeleteThanks Nilanjana. I've never been in a helicopter but I hope to take a scenic ride someday. Thanks for visiting.
DeleteDear friend: your story is very nice and rewarding to read. I got sucked into your sentences and I guess in that place, beautiful. kiss Elen
ReplyDeleteThanks Elen. I love happy endings. Thanks so much for your nice comment and for your visit. love and hugs.
DeleteDon't you just love surprises? Particularly when it's as wonderful as this? Great story!
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading and commenting on mine too.
Thanks Anne - yep love those happy surprises. Thanks for visiting.
DeleteSweet story.
ReplyDeleteThanks Darlene.
DeleteThis is truly the stuff romantic picnics are made of, Suzy ;)
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely Corinne. This is my dream date - someday somewhere.
DeleteGreat story and a lovely first entry. I enjoyed reading this very much. I am so glad it worked out for her in the end.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sally. Glad you enjoyed it. Appreciate your visit and comments.
DeleteOh, I think we all do long for that perfect date!
ReplyDeleteWe sure do Sandra. Thanks for dropping by.
DeleteNice surprize to find out that she's his intended. If I read your post right and this is your first submission, do have fun and keep them coming!
ReplyDeleteThanks J.L yes this is my first submission and it was fun. Thanks for visiting.
DeleteDear Suzy,
ReplyDeleteWelcome to RFW! What a good entry for your first post. This has a
lovely happy end! And I'm so happy for you protagonist!
Fits the theme perfectly too.
Best wishes,
Anna
RFW No.43 - 'Romantic Picnic'
Thanks Anna. I'm the eternal optimist so a happy ending is the way to go for me. Thanks for the visit.
DeleteHi,
ReplyDeleteOh what a cunning devil, and the perfect end to a nifty piece of prose! ;)
best
F
Thanks Francine. oh lol, yes I guess he was.
DeleteThis is every girl's dream! Very romantic picnic
ReplyDeleteThanks Heather - it's a date I dream of! Thanks for visiting.
DeleteHi Suzy
ReplyDeleteI loved your story, he is so tender and sweet.
Nancy
Thanks Nancy. Glad you liked my story. He is isn't he - my dream man.
DeleteWelcome to RFW, Suzy. And what a lovely picnic we have here. Well penned.
ReplyDeleteThanks Adura. glad you liked it.
DeleteSo nice to see a guy come through for a change... So many men are not the romantic types.... He went ALL out. What a nicely written story. Well done, Suzy.
ReplyDeleteThanks Michael. A tender, sweet and romantic man is a very attractive man.
DeleteWelcome to RFW Suzy. I followed you awhile back so am so excited to see you here this weekend.
ReplyDeleteYour entry is lovely. It's great suspense as she thinks he's setting the scene for a romantic date with someone other than her. What a perfect date he plans, all by himself, besotted with the lady by his side. Lots of lovely details which made your story very enjoyable.
Don't forget to come back to RFW if you'd like to vote for your favourite entry this week. Go with your gut. Really should be someone who kept to the word limit and has a romantic element! Poll will go up Monday AEST.
Thanks for entering! We made our 20 goal!
Denise
Thanks Denise. I had fun writing this - I am the hopeless romantic. I will be linking up again and will drop by on Monday. Thanks for hosting.
DeleteThis was so beautiful Suzy. ah, how sweet that she didn't know she was his special love. My heart reveled in the story, and the characters. Reminds me of the movie Some Kind Of Wonderful.
ReplyDeleteGuess I need to find it and watch it now :)
........dhole
Thanks Donna. I haven't seen the movie - will also have to find it and watch.
DeleteAwh I'm so glad it was requited love and a romantic date.
ReplyDeleteThanks Madeleine. I couldn't have ended it any other way.
DeleteI loved this!!! You did such a great job on this, capturing her innocence. Ah, LOVE!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Crystal. glad you liked it. yep, love is all we need.
DeleteMy dear Suzy,
ReplyDeleteYou are such a romantic!! Great story with the tender flavor of love and passion all over it. The ending was what all your readers hoped for (smile). Thank you for being part of RFW this week.
Thanks Andy. Yes, I am the eternal romantic. I enjoyed taking part. Thanks for inviting me.
DeleteI think that was a perfect picnic, but one has to wonder why she was so clueless. Nicely written.
ReplyDeleteThanks Scheherazade. I guess because she's like me - completely clueless :) they forgot to plant that "read the signals" chip in my brain when they sent me down to earth.
Delete